Psychiatrist: We going to do word association, I'll say a word and you say the first thing that come into your head, Ok? lets start Fish! PATIENT : Breasts PSYCHITRIST: Peanuts PATIENT: Breasts PSYCHIATRSIT: Lampshade PATIENT : Breasts PSYCHIATRIST: Oh for goodness sake, erm, text book PATIENT : Breasts Psychiatrists: Windscreen wipers. PATIENT : Breasts Psychiatrist: Look, this is ridiculous, how does windscreen wipers make you think of breasts? PATIENT: Easy... (moves head from side to side like a windscreen wiper) Breasts breasts breasts breasts.
do you know rad me old mate, there's someone round here nicked your name. quite brazenly using it for a business too. there it was in great big letters RAD plumbing! want me to let his tyres down or are you moonlighting?
I should re-train as a plumber. They get loads of cash, with the added bonus of having to fix washing machines for pneumatic blondes that are gagging for it! :D
9 comments:
Awwww hon. Don't be miserable, angry and vitriolic yes, but not miserable. Here, I will tell you a terrible joke.
A panda goes into a bar.
Barman says, why the big paws?
(big pause - good hey?)
and a good one someone left on my blog:
Psychiatrist: We going to do word association, I'll say a word and you say the first thing that come into your head, Ok? lets start
Fish!
PATIENT : Breasts
PSYCHITRIST: Peanuts
PATIENT: Breasts
PSYCHIATRSIT: Lampshade
PATIENT : Breasts
PSYCHIATRIST: Oh for goodness sake, erm, text book
PATIENT : Breasts
Psychiatrists: Windscreen wipers.
PATIENT : Breasts
Psychiatrist: Look, this is ridiculous, how does windscreen wipers make you think of breasts?
PATIENT: Easy... (moves head from side to side like a windscreen wiper) Breasts breasts breasts breasts.
The first one's right up my street. Exactly the sort of rubbish joke I like to tell.
The second one's genius. :D
I heard a good one the other day but it relies on audience participation. This was an amatuer stand-up on the chris moyles show.
'When I was a kid, I had one leg shorter than the other. So the doctor sent me to get some opthalmic shoes'...
Audience member: 'Orthopaedic'.
'I stand corrected'.
:D
oh yes, very good!
do you know rad me old mate, there's someone round here nicked your name. quite brazenly using it for a business too. there it was in great big letters RAD plumbing! want me to let his tyres down or are you moonlighting?
I should re-train as a plumber. They get loads of cash, with the added bonus of having to fix washing machines for pneumatic blondes that are gagging for it! :D
*cue music*
I've had a stinking cold and keep on making a twat of myself at my new job. That should cheer you up.
Hasn't worked K.
What's the new job?
cheer up charlie. friday tomorrow and then 48 hours of freedom before going back to the spirit crushing experience of work... i'm not helping am i?
Post a Comment